We’ve all heard the phrase, “This will be our new normal.” To be honest, I hate that phrase. I don’t want a new normal. I just want to go back to ordinary life. One where we can go to football games, sit at circular tables at lunch, smile at people, laugh with friends, and see all A-Z students in the school at the same time. While I like a lot of aspects of hybrid, at this point, I just want normal, everyday school. Especially this week, I’m so ready for this to be over. I’m done feeling trapped behind a mask and enclosed in the walls of my house. It’s so discouraging to realize that it's not going to get better anytime soon.
It’s crazy to think that we haven’t had “normal” in over 10 months (313 days) since March 13th. (We’ve almost made it through a whole year!) I was at track practice when I heard about the school closing. I was thrilled!! I would have had three huge tests the next Monday and was not prepared at all! I was stressed and needed a break! Two weeks off was exactly what I needed. Then covid just continued to get worse, and those two weeks turned into two months. School didn’t reopen, track season was canceled, AP tests were taken at home, and I never got to celebrate the last day of school with my friends. Because my dad works at a hospital, we have to stay extra careful. As I wrote about in my last post, this was a great time to reconnect and create memories with my family, but I still missed my friends. Now ten months later, there are friends that I still haven’t seen in person since that Friday. People that I used to see every single day, I haven’t seen in ten months.
I’m someone who really likes order and knowing what’s coming. I don’t like uncertainty or surprises. And this year has been full of uncertainty. Every minute of every day, we don’t know what might happen next or what curveball is coming our way. So many of our questions are answered by “I don’t know.” Will covid go away soon? Will we have prom this year? Will our senior year be normal? Will 2021 be better?
I just don’t know. My mom made a comment a few days ago responding to the question, “Will 2021 be better?” She said, “I don’t know...but I’m okay with that.” I’m working on being okay with uncertainty - I’m not there yet, but I’m learning how to cope with not knowing what’s ahead. Along with that, I’m working on adapting and being okay with this “new normal,” realizing that our lives will never be exactly the same. It hurts, and every day I hope I could just wake up from this bad dream of a year. While I hope it will all get better soon, I’ll keep learning until we get there.
I feel the exact same way! I hate not being in control too and it’s so hard sometimes. I look forward to when things get better! -Alyssa Ernst
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you, and I feel the same way as well. My dad works in a hospital as well and my mom comes in contact with the public everyday at her job too, so we've had to be really careful too. It's getting really tiring and redundant doing the online school portion at home, so I'm really looking forward to this new semester just for a sense of change. I really wish we could go back to normal school, so I could actually see some of my friends. Hopefully it's better for our senior year.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree with you. I am so sick of masks and restrictions and everything else that Covid has brought with it. I want to be able to walk in public without a mask on, and I want to be able to smile at people without looking like a weirdo who is just staring at the other person because they can't see my smile behind my mask. I miss the good old days that feel like they were so, so long ago. I hate uncertainty, and I hate that things could get better or worse at any second. I guess we're just have to get used to it for now, but hopefully not for much longer!
ReplyDelete